Putting Your Health First
Can I be honest? I have put everything first but myself. I was so focused on working. I was not thinking about my health.
I needed to please others. I felt I needed to prove them wrong. I was trying to please church members, coworkers, and family. Society teaches women to do this.
We have all seen women we know put other people's needs first. Our culture pushes this superwoman mentality on us. The need to save everyone and make them happy.
That people pleasing even led to how I wrote my blog. I wrote what I thought people wanted to hear. As bloggers, isn't that what businesses and social media experts tell us to do? Write what was popular or trending all of the time. Instead of writing what I liked, I wrote what others wanted.
Doing this over the years has put tremendous stress on my body. I kept going. Hoping I would win people over. I found that I did not win them over. Some used me and left me alone. Others, I got frustrated with and finally let them go.
I was not listening to my body. But the pain was there for a reason. Pain allows us to know something is wrong. That is why we all need to listen to our bodies.
After what happened to my health years ago, I am no longer trying to please people. The desire to push myself to the point of exhaustion is gone. None of this came overnight.
It took years of unlearning. If you can relate to this, I am sharing the things I learned.
How to Put Your Health First
1. Listen to the Warning Signs
I learned not to ignore my physical pain. If you are having constant headaches, high blood pressure, and any signs of distress, go to the hospital.
I stopped worrying about going to the doctor's office. Worrying about the expenses, what my boss would say, or what coworkers would say. It was better to go and find out what was wrong. Because I knew my boss would replace me regardless of what happened.
During the pandemic, I saw that firsthand. Teachers would get sick and sometimes die. The administration told them to work in situations that were not safe. Only for the school board to find a replacement before the person's funeral even happened.
Seeing this really had an impact on me. I learned companies and organizations did not care about their workers. Not using safe policies and proper procedures puts people at risk in the first place. I decided I needed to do something better.
Self-care was something I learned to do. I needed to preserve my energy. Listening to my body and getting the rest I needed.
2. Get Your Rest
I was not getting an adequate amount of sleep. I still was working too much. I was taking on more than I could handle. I did not have any boundaries for myself.
I learned to get enough sleep. To take breaks whenever I need them. Everyone should do this, especially when they are not feeling well. Being sick can take a lot out of you. Get your rest whenever you need it. Learn to set boundaries for yourself.
3. Set Boundaries
My supervisors piled work on me. They felt I was a hard worker and would not say no. My directors told me to do tasks that were not my responsibility. Since others refused to do their work, the administration thought I should do it instead.
I started speaking up for myself. It was not my problem to carry someone else's load. I refuse to do it. I was already doing the job of three teachers. I did not need to be the director as well. Since the administration wanted me to take my coworkers' workload, I left.
Set your boundaries.
Here are some boundaries you can have:
I am going to take my break when I need it.
I am not comfortable talking about this at work.
I cannot stay past 5 pm because (insert what you have to do).
I am on vacation; I am not available.
While I am on medical leave, I am not available.
I will not answer emails after 10 PM.
I am honored that you think I can do this assignment, however, I have to focus on the duties that you already assigned me.
I know I am working from home, but I am keeping the normal business hours.
I can't lower my price; I hope you can find someone that will fit your budget.
I will not take on more than I can handle.
Let people know how they should treat you. Let them know what you believe in. If they refuse to show you respect, then leave.
4. Stop Stressing
Most health problems people face are caused by negative stress. Stress causes your blood pressure to rise as well as your heart rate. Also, stress can weaken your immune system.
I saw how negative stress was affecting me. I had to do something. I stopped stressing about things that were not my problem. I focused on what I needed to do. I focused on what I could change.
We cannot eliminate all stress, but we manage it. Music and exercise have been beneficial for me. I also cut off people in my life. The ones who were causing the stress. Why would I keep people in my life who were doing me harm?
5. Cut out Toxic People
Toxic people can bring you down when you are unwell. Cut out individuals who ignore your health problems.
People who only call you when they need something. Those who use you. Adults you have to provide support to all the time. I am not talking about dogs who are sick and need your help.
I am talking about people who can do for themselves. But refuse to do anything for themselves. Those individuals can cause a lot of pain.
If you are getting stressed out because of them, it is time to cut them loose.
Be around individuals who support you. That will provide you help and advice when needed.
6. Minimize your time with the news and social media
After seeing so many negative things online and the news, I decided to limit my time online. I also found that there was a lot of harassment on platforms.
Over the past few months, there has been an increase in social media and websites allowing individuals to harass people. Filing reports about the behavior on the websites or apps does little to stop it.
Some days, I did not go online at all. When I spent less time online, I was in less pain. I also experienced less anxiety. I spent more time taking care of myself. I was doing other things that made my health better. Instead of missing the next viral hit! It helped me to feel better!
That is why it is good to have a detox from social media. If you have increased anxiety or depression after being online, then stop. Unfollow what triggers you. Find an activity or hobby that makes you feel better. Writing, reading, exercising, meditating, drawing, or spending time with people you love are healthy things to do.
Conclusion:
This whole experience was scary but eye-opening. I learned a lot about myself and listening to my body. I finally got over my fear of worrying about what others thought.
I now reject opinions that cause harm. I don't even consider them anymore because I respect myself too much.
I am going to do what is best for me. That means taking care of myself first.
The biggest thing I learned is that my health is important. You only get one body and one life. You have to take care of yourself.
What are you doing to put your health first?
How are you putting your health first?
Don't forget to share!
